Emails from Olympus
by Sofaloafa
Summary: Must I explain? They are just emails from gods, demigods, and all sorts of other things. Questions are asked, answers are given, and everything else falls in place. People talk about Percy behind his back, Demeter has serious cereal moments, and everyone wonders why Leo is on their account.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, I know this is like, the most used theme out there, but I wanted to try it out for myself. Only now it's with email and not chat or letters. I'm sorry if I seem like a copier, I'm am basically known for that. But no, Andrew*, I only had to copy that one word, from that one spelling test, on that one day! But you can't blame me, I mean when are we ever going to spell the word hymn in our lives? It doesn't even make sense on how to say it. Do you say it like "him" or do you say it like its spelled, "hymn." (Emphasis on the 'N' part.) Wow, that was way off topic. Anyway, back to the story theme. If you have any ideas for questions, please review or PM me. Include the people you want it to be from, and who you want send it to. Thanks! **

**-Sophia, daughter of Apollo. *Not a real person.**

Dear Zeus,

Do you ever fight with Hera over the little things, like, who sleeps on what side of the bed? Just wondering.

-Your brother, Poseidon. _Don't forget Hades! Me! You never want to forget the lord of the underworld!_ Shut up! _He, he. Beds. Sleeping together._ I said shut up!

Dear Hades and Poseidon,

Be quiet, both of you.

-Zeus.


	2. Chapter 2

Dear Persephone,

How is it having the goddess of the harvest as your mom?

-Percy Jackson, son of the sea god.

Dear Perseus Jackson,

My childhood... Sucked. Everyday it was the same, cereal for breakfast, lunch and dinner. It's never, "Oh, Persephone, what do you want to eat?" Always, "We are eating cereal and that's that." Thank you for asking though.

-Persephone, very annoyed daughter.


	3. Chapter 3

Dear Artemis,

I think I already know the answer to this one, but I'm still going to ask it. Can I date one of your hunters?

-Apollo, god of the sun and hot in both ways.

Dear Apollo,

Why you little-************************************!

-Very angry Artemis.

Dear Artemis,

Wow little sis! Just asking.

-Apollo, still hot in both ways.

Dear Apollo,

We have gone over this! I am not your little sister, you're my little brother!

-Still very angry Artemis.


	4. Chapter 4

Dear Minotaur,

Have you ever thought of taking a job in bull fighting?

-Connor Stoll, master prankster and thief.

Dear Connor,

Yes, actually I have thought of that. But then I found out what they do to the bulls and I was like, no way man! But yes, I have thought of taking a job in bull fighting.

-The Minotaur

P.S. If you end up in the labyrinth, I'll try to make your death slow and painful. It's the least I can do.


	5. Chapter 5

Dear Aphrodite,

Want to hang out at my place tonight?

-Ares, a very sexy god of war.

Dear Ares,

I would love to!

-Aphrodite

Dear Ares,

If you so much as THINK about doing anything with her, so help me I will throw you off Olympus even farther then I was.

-Hephaestus, the best craftsman ever and world famous pitcher.

Dear Hephaestus,

When'd you get on here?

-Ares, a very scared god of war.

Dear Ares,

Well duh, I gave you guys the email accounts.

-Hephaestus, also great with technology.


	6. Chapter 6

Dear Drew,

What happened after Jason left with Leo and me on that quest? If you messed up my side of the room, so help me I will hunt you down to the ends of the earth and it will not be pretty. Got that?

-Piper McLean, daughter of Aphrodite and your cabin mate.

Dear Piper,

Well, if I told you what I did, you said yourself it would not be pretty. So, yea.

-Drew, the person whose scared to be hunted down to the ends of the earth.


	7. Chapter 7

Dear Hermes,

Have you played any good pranks lately?

-?

Dear ?,

Yes actually. Recently, I added Hera's clothes with Aphrodite's in the wash, they tuned pink! When Hera put them on, she smelled like designer perfume! You know she hates both of those.

-Hermes, god of messengers and thiefs.

Dear Hermes,

Good! Now I have proof that it was you! Ha ha! I knew it all along! But Zeus was all like "Oh he wouldn't do something like that to my queen!" Proves him wrong!

-A very excited Hera, queen of the gods.

*Hermes' message was deleted.*


	8. Chapter 8

Dear Annabeth,

I have a feeling that we're being watched and everything we do is written in a New York Times best seller series. Do you feel that way?

-Percy Jackson, son of the sea god and your boyfriend.

Dear Percy,

Yes! I have felt that way sometimes. And I also feel like millions of people love it.

-Annabeth Chase, daughter of Athena.

Dear Annabeth,

Sickos.

-Percy Jackson.


	9. Chapter 9

Dear Apollo,

How did the last oracle deal with this? I mean, sure she's been dead for a while, but she was living at one point right? I just delivered a prophecy at school and got detention for a week.

-Rachel Elizabeth Dare

Dear Rachel,

Just deal with it.

-Apollo, god of prophesies.

Dear Apollo,

Well that was helpful.

-Rachel Elizabeth Dare.


	10. Chapter 10

Dear Mrs. Jackson,

What happened to Percy's old, smelly Stepdad, Gabe?

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Annabeth,

I turned him into a decorative lawn ornament. Sold for a very good price. Ha ha!

-Call me Sally.

Dear Sally,

...okay...

-Annabeth Chase


	11. Chapter 11

Dear Fanfiction Authors,

What in Hades!? I was scrolling through the M rated stories, and I can't believe you people! Why in Zeus' name are you writing stories between me and Percy?! I personally don't like same gender love stories, it's just gross.

-Nico DiAngelo, son of Hades.

Dear Nico,

Ummm... Well, they just came into our heads.

-Fanfiction Authors.

Dear Fanfiction Authors,

Yeah, it just popped up in your heads like a little chick.

-Nico DiAngelo, an angry son of Hades.


	12. Chapter 12

Dear Athena,

What is your opinion on the idea that technology is going to take over?

-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo. (A.K.A. Sophia.)

Dear Sophia,

Well- *The rest of the message was deleted because it was one hundred thousand words long and had no purpose whatsoever except to bore the living daylights out of us all. So thank me.* And that is my conclusion.

-Athena, goddess of wisdom.


	13. Chapter 13

Dear Zoè Nightshade,

Did you know that stars are just big balls of gas floating up in space with no intended order? Constellations are just pictures made by people's minds to figure out where everything is in life.

-Bianca DiAngelo, old huntress and brother to Nico DiAngelo.

Dear Bianca,

Yes I knew that! What? Did thou think I was stupid?

-Zoè Nightshade.


	14. Chapter 14

Dear Perseus Jackson,

You know, you could have just told me you didn't want to be turned into a stone statue. And even if you did, you could have cut me in half somewhere else. Maybe at my torso? I tend to like my snakes and I don't appreciate being cut at my neck.

-Medusa

Dear Medusa,

Yeah... No. Try not turning people into statues in the first place.

-Percy Jackson, son of Poseidon.


	15. Chapter 15

Dear Poseidon,

Where did you sail off on that day and never saw my mom again? I've always wondered that.

-Percy Jackson, your son.

Dear Percy,

If you don't tell your mom, I will tell you.

-Poseidon.

Dear Poseidon,

Okay I won't.

-Percy.

Dear Percy,

I went to the Bahamas because I kinda saw a REALLY hot woman there. Don't tell your mom!

-Poseiden.

Dear Poseidon,

YOU DIDN'T MAKE ME SWEAR ON THE STYX! MOM!

-Percy Jackson.


	16. Chapter 16

Dear Coach Hedge,

Why do call us all cupcakes? Sure it's funny at times, and we've even made jokes about it, but it just makes no sense.

-Jason, Piper and Leo Valdez. (Leo Valdez is the supreme commander of the world and the Argo II.)

Dear Cupcakes,

First off, why are you making jokes about me? Secondly, Leo, don't take any credit or I smash you with my baseball bat.

-Coach Hedge protector.

Dear Coach,

Now that won't be very protector like, will it? (Feel free to hit Leo as many times as you want.)

-Jason and Piper. _Also Leo! Don't forget Leo Valdez! Don't hit Leo! He is awesome!_


	17. Chapter 17

Dear Piper,

_Roses are red,_

_Viotlets are blue,_

_Cashews are nuts,_

_And so are you._

Will you be my valentine Piper McLean?

-From Connor Stoll.

Dear Connor,_  
_

First off, that poem was insulting, sencond, I already have a boyfriend, and third, it's not even valentines day.

-Piper.


	18. Chapter 18

Dear Chiron,

Have you ever thought of hooking up with someone and having little centaur babies?

-Try and find out!

Dear Whoever you are,

How dare you! I have been a trainer for three thousand years, and never, in my entire life, have heard anyone ask that! And I've heard a lot of weird things. This one, my friend, tops the list!

-Chiron, master hero trainer and offended centaur.


	19. Chapter 19

Dear Hazel,

Somehow I get the feeling that Leo just wants to light himself on fire to scare me. I don't know why, but I just feel like it.

-Frank, son of Mars.

Dear Frank,

That may be true, but you forgot that I also want too!

-Hazel, supreme commander of the world.

Dear Leo,

GET OFF MY EMAIL! YOU LITTLE SON OF A *****!

-Very angry Hazel, daughter of Pluto.

Dear Hazel,

Wow, I have never heard you swear. Thats just... Wow.

-Frank


	20. Chapter 20

Dear Ares,

I have just learned a new rhyme and wanted to know what you thought of it:

Boys are rotton, made out of cotton

Girls are sexy, made out of Pepsi

Girls go to college to gain more knowledge

Boys go to Jupiter to get even stupider.

-Aphrodite.

P.S. Apollo found it for me.

Dear Aphrodite,

I will KILL that Apollo along with you. Happy 7,236,145th bad-day-with-me anniversary!

-Ares, a very SMART god of war.

Dear Ares,

I find your last signature very unreliable, untrustworthy, and overall highly stupid.

-Athena, the real goddess of wisdom.


	21. Chapter 21

Dear Poseidon,

Did you create my little pony too? 'Cause if you did, I'd like your signature and to show it to Hermes.

-Apollo, god of awesomeness.

Dear Apollo,

Excuse me for asking, but what is this, my little pony.

-Poseidon.

Dear Hermes,

Dude, he doesn't know what my little pony is!

-Excited Apollo.

Dear Apollo,

He doesn't know what my little pony is?! Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!

-Very excited Hermes.

Dear Apollo and Hermes,

I'm going to log off now.

-Confused Poseidon.


	22. Chapter 22

Dear Percy,

I hear you can breathe underwater too!

-Spongebob Squarepants.

Dear Spongebob,

AHHH! Get it away from me! AHHH!

-Percy Jackson, not a Spongebob fan.

Dear Percy,

Aww, come on. At least give me a chance?

-Spongebob.

Dear Spongebob,

NO! You freaking creep me out!

-Percy Jackson, still not a spongebob fan.


	23. Chapter 23

Dear Mr. D,

What did that nymph have that you wanted so badly? Everyone at camp says that you wanted to kiss her.

-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo (A.K.A. Sophia)

Dear Sophia,

What? No! She stole one of my wine glasses. I'm going to turn the entire camp into dolphins now. Thank you for alerting me, for that I won't make you do dish duty the rest of the month.

-Mr. D, camp director.

**Dear Readers,**

**(And yes, this is an authors note.) I am wondering what you would like to me to write next. Do you want it to be from:**

**A) A monster.**

**B) A god or goddess.**

**C) A mortal. Or-**

**D) A demigod. (Both living and dead I can do.) **

**Please cast your vote through review, or you can PM me. **

**-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo. (A.K.A. Sophia.)**


	24. Chapter 24

Dear Athena,

Can I borrow one of your books on wild animals?

-Artemis.

Dear Athena,

You know she's just going to feed it to the deers.

-Apollo, god of poetry.

Dear Apollo,

What? I will not do that! You are doing nothing but telling lies! And it's not "deers", it's deer!

-Artemis, goddess of the hunt.

Dear Apollo,

Yes, I knew that. I wasn't going to lend it to her anyways.

-Athena, goddess of wisdom.

Dear Athena,

Smarty pants.

-Apollo and Artemis.


	25. Chapter 25

Dear Hades,

Do you mind if I could get a pay increase? I would prefer a giant dog bone, but a rubber ball will do.

-Cerberus, three headed dog, guardian of the underworld.

Dear Cerberus,

No! Have you seen the amount of dead coming in? I can't make enough to pay Charon more, let alone a three headed dog too!

-Hades, god of the underworld, supreme ruler over all the dead.

Dear Hades,

_Wimper._

-Cerberus.


	26. Chapter 26

Dear Apollo,

Why don't you ask Zeus to tell you who's older?

-Dove.

Dear Dove,

That is a great idea!

-Apollo, god of awesomeness.

Dear Zeus,

Who do you think is older? Me, or that stuck up hunter Artemis?

-Apollo and Artemis. _I am not stuck up! I'm sure he will say I'm older._

Dear Apollo and Artemis,

If my memory serves me right, it was Artemis who was born first. She then helped with Apollo being born. Thus becoming the goddess of childbirth.

-Zeus, god of great memory.

Dear Zeus,

Well then your memory doesn't serve you right.

-Apollo.

Dear All,

Stop posing as other gods and goddess! It gets annoying! Mnemosyne is the goddess of memory! Mnemosyne! Uhh!

-Athena, very annoyed goddess.

**Line break.**

Dear Nico,

What happened to your mythomagic cards?

-Dove.

Dear Dove,

Well, I'm not quite sure, but I have a hunch. I think Percy burned them, but I don't know. Hey, what's that smell? Smells like... oh gods. No! No! My mythomagic cards!


	27. Chapter 27

Dear Demeter,

Can you please stop forcing Hades to eat his cereal? He gets really grumpy and then makes me eat all of it. It gets old after a while.

-Persephone, Your daughter.

Dear Persephone,

He's making you eat it?! Now I have to give him twice the cereal to make up for all that's lost! And maybe while I'm at it, give you some more too. Cereal is abundant for all! CEREAL! EAT IT!

-Demeter, goddess of cereal. (And not that junky captain crunch. I'm talking Special K. Or honey bunches of oats.)

Dear Demeter,

Whatcha talking about?

-Hades.

Dear Hades,

Good! Your here! Now I can give you cereal personally and watch you eat so you don't feed it to the dog! Ha! Ha!

-Demeter, still the goddess of cereal.

Dear Demeter,

No! You can't make me! You can't make me! No!

-Hades, scared of the crazy cereal lady.


	28. Chapter 28

Dear Hera,

Was it you or Zeus who threw Hephaestus of Olympus?

-Sofaloafa.

Dear Sofaloafa,

Okay! I admit it! It was me because I thought he didn't belong in the family! His face was too misshapen! I was not in control of my actions!

-Hera, supreme ruler over all the gods.

Dear Hera,

So, what would happen if I called you a stuck up hypocrite?

-Sofaloafa.

Dear Sofaloafa,

I will turn you into a horrid form of Hephaestus and toss you off Olympus.

-Hera, still the supreme ruler.

Dear Leo,

What, in my husbands name, are you doing?! Why are you in my account!? I will turn YOU into a puppy and throw you off Olympus!

-Hera, a very ticked off goddess.


	29. Chapter 29

Dear Clovis,

Have you ever met your dad's roman equivalent?

-Morpheus, god of dreams.

Dear Morpheus,

You mean Somnus? No, and may I never have the pleasure to. You don't know the temper tantrum he throws when he catches you sleeping on the job. It's really-

*Clovis fell asleep on his computer.


	30. Chapter 30

Dear Nico,

Did you ever figure out if Percy can surf?

-Annabeth Chase, daughter of Athena.

Dear Annabeth,

No, I haven't. And we may never know.

-Nico DiAngelo, son of Hades.

Dear Nico,

You can say that again. We went to a beach for our first date, and he wouldn't go near the surfboards. We kissed and all that stuff but never went surfing.

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Annabeth,

Ew...

-Nico DiAngelo


	31. Chapter 31

Dear Clarisse,

Percy seems to have a knack for annoying you. Do you ever want to just slap him? 'Cause I do.

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Annabeth,

Yes! You do not know how long I have waited to hear that! Someone who finally understands! I just want to slap him, break my spear on his head, or throw him in the campfire! Or all three! Yeah, that'll be the day.

-Clarisse la Rue, doesn't care a bit for the Poseidon brat.


	32. Chapter 32

Dear Hades,

I think I have an idea! Instead of making you eat it, we could make some satyers eat it! Cereal _will _prevail!

-Demeter, goddess of cereal.

Dear Demeter,

Yes that is a great idea! Follow through with it as soon as possible! I especially like the part where you don't feed it to me anymore! Of course the satyr part is good too... but don't feed it to me! Oh, and I assume you will be too busy to feed me cereal?

-Hades, god of the underworld.

Dear Hades,

Of course I'll give you more cereal! I didn't know you liked it so much that you would ask for some! My little girl's husband is asking for cereal! *Cue cheek pinching.* Yay! I'm so excited!

-Demeter, proud her daughter picked such a nice young gentleman.


	33. Chapter 33

Dear Mrs. Dodds,

I hear the little hyperactive brat is still alive. Did he just get kicked out of another school? Because I wanted to be around to see that! Or is his crippled friend limping around in crutches again? I just wanted to see if he's okay.

-Nancy Bobofit.

Dear Nancy,

Well, I tried to take care of him, but alas, he does not want me to. I don't know what's wrong.

-Mrs. Dodds


	34. Chapter 34

Dear Nico,

Can you get Internet in the underworld?

-Percy Jackson, son of the sea god.

Dear Percy,

No! I can't! It's not like I'm sitting in my dad's palace right now, typing on the computer that I can't use because there's no Internet. Oh, and I'm not emailing you either because there's no Internet down here.

-Nico DiAngelo, son of Hades.

Dear Nico,

Really! I would have come down there and installed a network! Maybe I would need an electrician, but I could do it.

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Please note the sarcasm.

-Nico DiAngelo.


	35. Chapter 35

Dear Annabeth,

I know you sleep with Percy. I see it when I peek through your window at night. You're all like, "Oh Percy! I want to be with you forever and ever!"

-Luke Castellan.

Dear Luke,

What. The. Hades. Why are you looking in my window at night? Have you ever heard of privacy? I could go on and on and bore you to death about what I think of spies, but I have a more suitable punishment. Percy, you may come forth.

-Annabeth Chase, has an evil grin on her face.

Dear Luke,

What!? What!? What!? How dare you! Spying on MY girlfriend?! I don't think so! You, my friend, have just earned yourself a place in Percy's personal fields of punishments! I can't believe it! Why?! Why?! Why?! I will hunt you down, bring a hellhound with me, and make it tear you to shreads! No wait, scratch that. I will hunt you down myself, and tear you to shreads myself. I will KILL you! And I swear, I will enjoy every second of it! Maybe I'll even get Ares to help me! Yeah! I'd start running if I were you! I will hunt you down! I don't mean downtown, I mean ten feet underground! (Specifically to the underworld. But hey, no one's perfect.) Are you running yet?

-Percy Jackson, a very, and I mean VERY angry son of Poseidon.


	36. Chapter 36

Dear Frank,

I think you're a chick magnet! Get it? 'Cause your girlfriend can summon metals! Huh? Anyone? Someone? No one?

-Leo Valdez, really bad pun maker.

Dear Leo,

If you speak of this to anyone, lets just say I'll turn into a rabid raccoon just for you. And hide in your bathroom.

-Frank, rabid raccoon.

**Yes, this is something that just popped in my head and I wanted to share it with the people of the world. (Literally and figuratively.) Thanks for reading, and remember the three R's! Read, review, and... Eh, I forgot the last one.**


	37. Chapter 37

Dear Annabeth,

Have you heard? There's this toy called Legos and I heard its for architects like you. There is this new architecture studio that I think you might like.

-Nico DiAngelo, son of Hades.

Dear Nico,

Yes, I have heard of it and I could care less. I've got a headache and I don't want to deal with the likes of you anymore. Just leave me alone.

-Annabeth, grumpiest person in the world.

Dear Annabeth,

Why so grumpy? You were just hugging a tree last time I saw you.

-Nico.

Dear Nico,

Don't make me talk about it or I punch you.

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Annabeth,

Oh... It's that time of the month again, isn't it? *Snicker*

-Nico DiAngelo.

Dear Nico,

Shut up.

-Annabeth Chase.


	38. Chapter 38

Dear Percy,

Happy birthday! Happy, happy birthday! Happy birthday to you! Do you know what day it is? Give yourself a clue! I am awesome at rhymes. Actually, the Apollo cabin helped me, but we can't all be perfect in everything, Right? Oh, Annabeth wanted to say something.

Annabeth: I love you Percy! Gods. Is this showing to everybody? I will kill whoever says that I said that. Got that? Back to the point, happy b-day kelp head!

Jason: Happy birthday! Best wishes.

Frank: Woof! Woof!

Hazel: Frank, stop acting like a dog and say a proper happy birthday to Percy. Happy birthday!

Frank: Happy birthday. Now I have some bickering to do.

Piper: Happy birthday! Lets hope my cabin doesn't sabotage your party and make you kiss Annabeth.

Leo Valdez has already said his part. Go to the very top to see it. I'll give you time.

*Hold music.*

Done? Did you get what I wrote? Yep! It's the "Dear Percy" part!

-Every one of your friends.

Dear Percy,

Aw... Thanks! I don't think it's my b-day though.

-Percy Jackson.

P.S.

JUST KIDDING!


	39. Chapter 39

Dear Thalia,

So, I have been reading stories where you and Nico are paired up. Huh? Are those true? Hmmm?

-Percy Jackson, son of the sea god.

Dear Percy,

Why *slap* are *slap* you *slap* writing *slap* this *slap* where *slap* the whole *slap* world *slap* can see it? *Slappity slap slap slap*

-Thalia Grace.

Dear Thalia,

Wow. I didn't know you had such strong feeling for Nico that you would slap me several times in a sentence.

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

I think the cake was spiked. You ate too much of the cake Percy. Leo added vodka to it. He switched the water with vodka and added some to the cake. I have to go slap him now.

-Thalia.

Dear Thalia,

I did not! I added rum!

-Leo Valdez, natural drink mixer.

Dear Leo,

*Slap, slap, slap, slap.*

-Thalia.

Dear Thalia,

Wow. Even virtual slaps hurt.

-Leo Valdez.


	40. Chapter 40

Dear Mr. D and Percy,

Pepsi is the best! Nothing compares to an ice cold PEPSI! Live for now! Ya!

-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo.

Dear Sofaloafa,

Coke rules! Pepsi drools! Pepsi is the worst! Coke is not a curse! Coke! Coke! Coke!

-Mr. D and Percy.

**Dear Readers,**

**If you are reading this, then cast your vote! Coke or Pepsi? Why am I doing this? Well, it's a special day! I now have twenty-three reviews! Yay! I was going to do this yesterday, but I had other ideas. So happy late b-day Percy!**

**-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo.**


	41. Chapter 41

Dear 44Lefty,

Thanks hon! Reviewing every chapter really means a lot to me. Especially since I'm your favorite demigod! Right? I am, right?

-Leo Valdez, the hottest demigod to ever walk the earth. ('Cause I can catch on fire! What'd you think?)

Dear Leo,

Well...

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

What? You thought that?! I can't believe you people! Who, in their right minds, thinks that?

-Leo Valdez, still the hottest demigod to ever walk the earth.


	42. Chapter 42

Dear Hermes,

I hear you own Hermes express, can work for it too?

-Connor Stoll, your son.

Dear Connor,

Well, um... Sure! You can be the, uh, sitting there and doing nothing person! I await your arrival.

-Hermes, god of messengers.

Dear Hermes,

You don't want me to, do you?

-Connor Stoll.

Dear Connor,

Nope.

-Hermes.


	43. Chapter 43

Dear Triton,

How's life under the sea? I wanted to come, but my dad doesn't. It's like he thinks we'll get along horribly or something.

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Do me a favor and don't talk to me.

-Triton.

Dear Triton,

What? I thought we could be best buds! You're just going to go and say "don't talk to me"? What happened to being buddies? Bros? Amigos?

-Percy Jackson, obviously not your bro.

Dear Percy,

I thought you were MY amigo!

-Leo Valdez.


	44. Chapter 44

Dear hydra,

I'm wondering how you have so many heads. And how do they grow back? Scientifically speaking, you would need some sort of mixture, but since you don't have one, you're not scientifically possible!

-Malcom, son of Athena.

Dear Malcom,

Dude, most of the monsters in greek mythology aren't scientifically possible. Just live with it.

-Hydra.


	45. Chapter 45

Dear Percy,

I saw you with Annabeth yesterday! It was so nice to see you getting along. But, why did she slap you? Then, you started kissing! Ew! I was coming into the cabin and you didn't notice me. What were you talking about? Isn't there a rule that says a boy and a girl can't be alone together in a cabin unless they have the same parent? Did you break the rules?

-Tyson, cyclops.

Dear Tyson,

You... Saw that? Tyson, please don't tell anyone. I beg of you! If you do, I don't think I'll be able to live!

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Well brother, everyone's already reading this.

-Tyson.


	46. Chapter 46

Dear Katie,

I don't get it. People are pairing us together and it's like the most popular pairing on earth. Or on fanfiction anyways.

-Travis Stoll, son of Hermes.

Dear Travis,

I still despise you. Even if you do take me to fireworks beach.

-Katie Gardner, daughter of Demeter.

Dear Katie,

Are you still on that chocolate bunny thing? That was like, a couple years ago. But, uh, will you go to fireworks beach? You don't have to do much, just a couple kisses would be nice.

-Travis Stoll, son of Hermes.

Dear Travis,

Hmm... Let me ponder that. Okay, I'll do it on one condition. You give me my ten feet of personal space.

-Katie Gardner, daughter of Demeter.

Dear Katie,

Awh... I don't wanna! I want to be with you! Not nine feet away from you!

-Travis Stoll, son of Hermes.

Dear Travis,

Actually, you need to stay ten feet, five centimeters and two millimeters away. Exactly. No less, no more. You Hermes boys aren't really known for your intelligence.

-Katie Gardner, daughter of Demeter.

Dear Katie,

You, my friend, are an Athena nerd.

-Travis Stoll, not a son of Athena.


	47. Chapter 47

Dear Artemis,  
How would you feel if you got an incredibly bloodthirsty adoptive daughter  
named Sachmis and sent her out to kill every mortal boy and man on earth, even your sorry excuse of a brother, Zeus, Posiedon, Hades, Hermes, Ares, etc…  
(No goddesses harmed)?  
From, Lioness Deity.

Dear Lioness,

Well, there would be the ups and downs. For one, there would be no more children. So now, I am stuck with the hunters I have. That would really bum me out. But on the other hand, no more chance of men watching me bathe, no more listening to a haiku every five minutes and especially no more Athena and Poseidon fights. Do you know how bad they get? It's like, one minute we're having a formal meeting, the next minute they are fighting over the stupidest things. Like who's turn it is to annoy Zeus. If you ask me, they do at the same time. In fact, they annoy Zeus so much, that they annoy everyone else too! Ugh! Anyway, I don't think that would be a good idea, I wouldn't have anymore hunters! Yep. I, Artemis, goddess of the hunt, have officially become a debate queen.

-Artemis, goddess of the moon. (And debates. Sorry it's so long, just had to say the ups and downs of having a daughter like that.)


	48. Chapter 48

Dear Ares,

Would you like to go to the movies? I hear there's this wonderful movie called the Sea of Monsters!

-Aphrodite, goddess of love.

Dear Aphrodite,

Well, I'd love to, but unfortunately I have to go clean my toilets and be Hephaestus' personal slave.

-Ares, a very stupid god of war.

Dear Hephaestus,

I have no idea how you and Leo get on our accounts.

-Ares, god of war.

Dear Ares,

We have our ways. Although it will always be a mystery. Always.

-Hephaestus, god of fire.

Dear Hephaestus and Ares,

How come I always get ignored when I email one of you guys? I'd like some attention too.

-Aphrodite, goddess of love.

Dear Aphrodite,

Attention Hog.

-Ares and Hephaestus.


	49. Chapter 49

Dear Demeter,

Do you ever think of anything other than Special K?

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Of course! I think of honey bunches of oats, fiber one, and raisin bran! What? Did you think I only thought of ONE cereal! I even wrote a book on the different kinds of cereal and the different purposes!

-Demeter, goddess of cereal.

Dear Demeter,

I mean something other than cereal. Do you think of anything other than cereal?

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Well, duh! I also think of whole grain oatmeal!

-Demeter, also the goddess of oatmeal.


	50. Chapter 50

Dear Frank,

Omg! Did you see the latest fashion? It was so awesome! Hey? Do you want to come to my place tonight? It would be so much fun! Talk to you later!

XOXO! -Hazel.

Dear Hazel,

Um... are you feeling okay? How are you feeling?

-Frank.

Dear Frank,

I'm feeling great! I was just talking to Piper!

-Hazel.

Dear Frank,

Just for the record, I did NOT count on her going crazy like this. It's not my fault.

-Piper.


	51. Chapter 51

Dear all of the demigods and gods and goddesses and monsters too if they want,  
Have you read harry potter? There are quite a few similarities between your  
two noble book series/lives.  
-an awesome fangirl.  
PS; hi leo :)

Dear Fangirl,

Harry Potter? Is he like, a hairy potter? One that makes pots? 'Cause that would be one hairy pot. But, no. I haven't read Harry Potter. Hmm. Maybe I could, but then I'd probably have to order a hairy pot from him, and I have absolutely no use for a hairy pot. Unless... I could use it for... No. Anyways, girl, you would be a perfect addition for team Leo! Hello!

-Leo Valdez. And all those others.

Dear Leo,

We are not, "all those others." We have names too you know.

-All those others.

Dear Leo,

LEO!

-All those others.


	52. Chapter 52

Dear Tyson,

Do you have depth perception problems?

-Connor Stoll.

Dear Connor,

Well, I don't think so. I mean, I can see that the lake is twelve feet deep. But, I think I almost killed Chiron with one of my arrows during archery. From then on, he made me use arrows with pillows in front of the tips.

-Tyson, cyclops.


	53. Chapter 53

Dear Argus,

Do you ever get migraines? I'd think so, because you have all those eyes all over your body.

-Connor Stoll.

Dear Connor,

Well, I guess. With all the eyes focusing on one thing or the other, it's kinda hard to focus on my head.

-Argus, head of security.

Dear Argus,

Wait a minute, I thought you never talk?

-Connor Stoll.

Dear Connor,

Well, I never talk, but that doesn't mean I never write.

-Argus.

**Dear Readers,**

**Over one-hundred reviews! Yay! Thanks so much for the support! I'm all smiles now!**

**-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo.**


	54. Chapter 54

Dear Octavian,

*Squeak* We know what you did to our brethren. *Squeak* We will rebel against you. *Squeak*

-The teddy bears you murdered all these times. *Squeak*

Dear Teddy Bears,

I can't believe I'm talking to a bunch of stuffed animals, but I just want to say: WHAT THE ****? Why are you- you- ah Pluto. Forget it.

-Octavian.

Dear Octavian,

Did you just call us stuffed animals? *Squeak*

-Teddy bears.


	55. Chapter 55

Dear Artemis,

So, I was thinking. I had just gathered a band of boys together, and turned them into the poets of Apollo! Huh? Is it great or is it great?

-Apollo, Leader of the poets.

Dear Apollo,

Well, I always knew you were always the copycat of the family. I knew it. It's in your genes.

-Artemis, leader of the hunt.

Dear Artemis,

Are you sneaking around my closet again? Did you find any- ahem- "stuff?"

-Apollo.

Dear Apollo,

What stuff? If you're talking about what I think you are, you'd better not be.

-Artemis.

Dear Artemis,

Never mind.

-Apollo.


	56. Chapter 56

Dear Percy,

Do you ever wonder, what would happen if Leo found a girlfriend?

-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo.

Dear Sofaloafa,

Well, It'd pretty much be the end of the world as we know it.

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Well, aren't you such a ray of sunshine? Mr. I-Have-A-Girlfriend-And-Don't-Care-Whether-Leo-Doe s-Or-Not.

-Leo Valdez, Angry demigod.


	57. Chapter 57

Dear Reyna,

So, do you have any feelings for Leo? I mean, sure, you guys are total opposites, but I mean, come on, you like him! You gotta admit it!

-Jason.

Dear Jason,

What. Did. You. Just. Say? I deny any and all rumors about Leo and me. It's just not... Natural.

-Reyna, Preator of New Rome.

Dear Reyna,

Aw... Really? That would be fun! We could kiss and we could-

Dear Leo,

No. Just... No. Don't even bother finishing that sentence. If you do, so help me, I will hunt you down, and you are going to wish that little Mexican hide of yours was never born.

-Reyna.


	58. Chapter 58

Dear Percy,  
Holy crap you're real! I've been reading all your thoughts ever since the first book came out! I love you! *kills Annabeth* MARRY ME!  
-Very obsessed fan Crissie.

Dear Everyone Who Can Help,

AHHHHH! Stalker! Someone get me a lawyer! And maybe a doctor too! I'm having a heart attack! No! *Cue dramatic death scene.* Noooooooooo...

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Just deal with it. Some of us have it worse than you.

-Elvis Presley.

Dear Elvis,

I'm not even going ask.

-Percy Jackson.


	59. Chapter 59

Dear Demeter,  
My favorite cereal is Captain Crunch, Lucky charms, And Cheerios. But I've never tried Special K. I am also a god so can I come and try it?  
- Goddess of charity and hope. (I made this up)

Dear Goddess,

What?! Okay, from now on, I ban any and all cereals that aren't Special K. Period. No questions asked. Got that?

-Demeter, goddess of Special K.


	60. Chapter 60

Dear Poseidon and Hades,  
You are awesome, Zeus is a drama king (though I feel that 'drama queen' is more accurate) :D  
-Lily.

Dear Lily,

I should smite you with my lightning bolts for saying such things. Unfortunately, my master bolt is in repair right now, so you have gotten it easy.

-Zeus, King of the gods.

**BTW: Today is a very sad day for Americans, 9/11. In honor of those who lost their lives, and the ones who are still suffering today, I dedicate this email to them. I just want to cheer them up. Even if it means trying to get this on nation wide. :)**


	61. Chapter 61

Dear Hades, Poseidon and Zeus,

How does it make you feel knowing that Hades didn't break the oath to have no children after the Second World War?

- Just a curious demigod.

Dear Demigod,

I would rather not talk about it.

-Zeus, king of the gods.

Dear Demigod,

Yeah. Me neither.

-Poseidon.

Dear Zeus and Poseidon,

ARE YOU KIDDING ME?! I could talk about it all DAY! I never broke the oath! Ha, Ha, Ha! I win! You lose! You never know! YOU never know! Nico and Bianca are way better than ALL your kids combined!

-Hades, god of awesomeness.

Dear Hades,

We all have a some complaints. Um, first of all, JASON will always be the best in everything! He is my kid after all.

No, obviously, Percy is the best. How many kids do you know that can control water like his good ole' dad?

That is MY signature! You son of a *****!

-Zeus, Poseidon, and Apollo. (Apollo is the god of awesomeness.)


	62. Chapter 62

Dear Hades,

Go to hell. Oh wait your already there. Bye.

-Nico's Ex-GF.

Dear Ex-GF,

Humh. Well, I'll have you know, I just won an argument with my brothers over who has the best kid, and I don't need you to spoil it.

-Hades, Nico is the best.

Dear Hades,

You did not WIN anything. You simply beat us in a small, petty, game.

-Poseidon and Zeus.

Dear Poseidon and Zeus,

Says the gods who let their children get kidnapped and stolen from. Nico never got himself into any of that.

-Hades.


	63. Chapter 63

Dear Zeus and Poseidon,

So, apparently, people have been telling me that Nico has gotten captured by twin giants. Still, not as bad as your own wife capturing your kids.

-Hades.

Dear Hades,

You can be such a sore loser. Just give it up.

-Zeus and Poseidon.

Dear Hades,

YEAH! JUST GIVE IT UP ALREADY!

-Everyone.

Dear Everyone,

Well, I'm glad I have such a big fan club.

-Hades.


	64. Chapter 64

Dear Leo,

Would you like to go on a date with me?

-Karri.

Dear Karri,

Well, hot stuff, I'd love too. I'll pick you up at eight.

-Leo Valdez.

Dear Leo,

Okay, let me get this straight. YOU, Leo Valdez, have just gotten yourself a date?

-Percy Jackson.

Dear Percy,

Yes. You've got a problem with that?

-Leo Valdez.


	65. Chapter 65

Dear Clarisse,

Poor you, nobody has sent you emails yet! Well, I'm here to change that! How are you? And Chris? How's Chrisse going? Are you both in LUUUURVE? How did Ares react when he found out you were dating a traitor? Have you and Chris "done it"? How did your siblings/his siblings/both your parents react when they found out?  
Love,  
Janet, daughter of Aphrodite.  
PS: Please don't kill me.

Dear Janet,

I'm about to get all girly girl on you. If you tell my dad, I'm gonna come after you personally and hunt you with Maimer. Well, Chris and I are good, I mean, if you don't count the time I almost killed him with a napkin. Yeah, you don't want to know. My dad beat him up after he found we had "done it", and I got a very good lesson on new ways to immobilise your enemy. He was in the infirmary for two weeks after that because my dad cursed him so all the ambrosia and nectar wouldn't work. Yeah, it was messy. Anyways, my siblings beat him up too, so I think he's had a rough week. Not quite sure though. His siblings were actually happy, so now I've got a cabin full of happy, beat-up Hermes kids. Chiron eventually had to talk to my cabin about "camp rules" but I think it just went in one ear and out the other for them.

-Clarisse, Daughter of the war god.


	66. Chapter 66

Dear Leo,

Can I join your team and help you rebuild Festus? Please? I'm a big fan of both you and dragons, you see, and I was completely devastated about what happened to that awesome metallic dragon of yours.

-Kifo Entiegon.

Dear Kifo,

Well, that depends on how good you are with fire. You see, Festus could get a little… cranky, and when he did, it usually ended up with me cleaning up the burned remains of our camp. But it was nothing major. Just a part of a cabin or something like that. Very, very rarely did someone happen to get caught up in one of those temper-tantrums. But, if you're like me, you'll do fine! Minus a couple limbs.

-Leo Valdez, best dragon fixer in the WORLD!


	67. Chapter 67

Dear All The Gods,

Why do you all fight so much? I suggest a peace treaty that CAN NOT BE BROKEN and kept by the Fates, so that if you try to break it you'll die, immortal or not. Also Hi Dad!

Cheers!

Celeste Emerald Seaglitter

PS Athena shall make the treaty, just to be safe.

PP Leo! Looks like you have another date!

Dear Celeste,

Na, Na, Na. Athena should make the treaty… blah, blah, blah. I could do it too! I'm just as smart as her! Besides, I'm the sun god! Who wouldn't want me to make something as important as a treaty?

-Apollo, god of awesomeness.

Dear Apollo,

Um… everyone.

-Athena.

Dear Athena,

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wisdom is better than looks. I've heard that speech a million times. It is my turn!

_Apollo rules all,_

_Artemis drools all the time,_

_Nothing is better! _

Yeah_. _This treaty will be in haiku!

-Apollo, god of haikus.


	68. Chapter 68

Dear Clarisse,

Dammmmn, and I thought MY dad was over protective! Okay, next questions! Since, ya know, we need to make up for all the previous chapters where you weren't sent a letter.

So, Clary, can I call you Clary? Clary, did you and Chris have a little hush-hush thing going on before he became a traitor? And how did you feel when you had to take care of him during those insane days?

And one last question. This has been really bothering me since your quest to the Sea of Monsters and to get your dad's Chariot. Is Ares- Did he ever... Did he ever hit you or your siblings?

Love,

Janet, daughter of Aphrodite.

Dear Janet,

First off, just so you know, don't call me Clary. That got Jackson into the infirmary for a week. Okay, so before Chris became a traitor, I absolutely despised him and his cabin mates. Now, I only dislike his cabin mates. I guess all that time spent trying to heal Chris kinda got me to have different feelings for him.

Now, what do you expect? Of course my dad hit us! He's the freaking war god! I wouldn't expect that from your mom, she's all about, "oh, your beauty has to attract as many guys as possible and then you have to dump them all for your rite of passage!" What the hell does that even mean? All my dad had to tell us was, "stay in line and don't get killed." That's like, the secret of life.

-Clarisse, daughter of the war god.


	69. Chapter 69

Dear Sofaloafa,

Are you female version of Rick Riordan? If you are, then THIS IS FOR ENDING MARK OF ATHENA ON A RICKHANGER! *charges with pitchfork*

-Ally, daughter of Hecate.

Dear Ally,

Gah! Don't kill me! I'm too awesome and famous to die!

-Sofaloafa, daughter of Apollo.

Dear Sofaloafa,

Yeah, right… You know, I can't believe I'm even related to you.

-Will Solace, son of Apollo.


	70. Chapter 70

Dear Leo,

I'm okay with fire, but I'm not fire proof like you are. Also, you forgot to answer the first part of my question - Can I join your team please?

-Kifo Entiegon, recently discovered daughter of Apollo (the name you see is my alias)

Dear Kifo,

Of course! I just got a tiny bit distracted. Well, maybe you would probably get by, but like I said, with claws the size of butcher knifes, you better prepare yourself.

-Leo Valdez.


	71. Chapter 71

Dear Poseidon,

You see there this kid at my school who is afraid of the water(made-up) Can you calm the waters down at Jones Beach from 2:30 to 5:00 tomorrow? And maybe send a merman to teach her how to swim because she doesn't trust just me. I can tell she's a demigod but she is afraid of the water and underground. She may be Zeus's daughter.

From Semoka, Daughter of Chiron.

Dear Semoka,

Uh... Yeah. Zeus' girl, Zeus' problem. Ha! Ha! Just kidding. Sure, I can calm the waters. But, only for like, an hour. (You know how my wife gets when she finds out I've been helping demigods.) She gets all: "BLAH! BLAH! Why are you helping people other than me? I don't get what the fad is with helping demigods. Let them die on their own.

-Poseidon, lord of the sea.

Dear Poseidon,

Huh. Go, go help demigods over my dead body!

-Amphitrite.

**Sorry I haven't updated in a while, school just got a bit… crazy. My teachers have been handing out homework like nobody's business. Anyways, letters may be less frequent now. Just a warning.**


	72. Chapter 72

Dear Annabeth,

What plan did you use to get out of Tartarus? And who shut the doors closed? I'm positive that one has to stay down there. Did you sacrifice Coach Hedge?

-Emma, daughter of Athena.

P.S. Please don't kill me Coach! Or call me cupcake! Or hit me with your baseball bat saying "Die!" Or anything else that's violent towards me!

Dear Emma,

Sorry, Annabeth Chase is unavailable right now. She just sacrificed herself.

-Default message. (A.K.A Percy.)

Dear Percy,

PERSEUS JACKSON! I will KILL you!

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Annabeth,

Sorry, Percy Jackson is unavailable right now. He just ran away.

-Default message. (A.K.A Percy.)

Dear Percy and Annabeth.

You cupcakes are just crazy. All of you. Including Emma. We all know that Percy and Annabeth never fell into Tartarus.

*News Flash* Oh. OH! OH GODS!

-Coach Hedge.


	73. Chapter 73

Dear all you guys,

1. Percy, did you or did you not kiss Rachel on the beach that day?  
2. Can I be on Team Leo? And Team Nico?  
3. Aphrodite, did you ever love Hephastus?  
4. Did the guys of the seven try to start a boyband?  
5. Chris, when did you start liking Clarrise?  
6. Who here likes the backstreet boys?

-Sierra, not a demigod.

Dear Sierra,

Um… yeah? Maybe, only if Annabeth doesn't figure out.

-Percy.

Dear Sierra,

Yes! Team Nico is always accepting new members. Team Leo might not though. Yeah, team Leo is not accepting new members.

-Nico. _Uh… what are you doing? Leo is always accepting._

Dear Sierra,

You mean that blacksmith? I mean… uh, yeah. Of course! It not like I wish Zeus would've given me to someone else. *Cough cough.*Ares*cough*

-Aphrodite.

Dear Sierra,

Yes, and let me tell you, it did not end well. Festus ending up committing suicide by hopping off the ship's mast, the music was that bad.

-Annabeth Chase.

Dear Sierra,

I've liked her since the day I first laid eyes on her. _Chris, you aren't that mushy._

_-_Clarisse and Chris.

Dear Sierra,

The… backstreet boys?

-Hazel.


	74. Chapter 74

Dear Nico,  
Hi! I just wanted to know 1) HOW DID YOU GET FREAKING STUCK WITH TWO GIANTS AND IN TARTARUS! NICO BE CAREFUL WE NEED YOU TO LIVE SO YOU CAN BRING BACK PERCY FROM THE DEAD! (Shut up Percy. You're a klutz and mostly an idiot. You'll probably do something stupid like trip and break your skull), 2) Do you like Green Day / My Chemical Romance? and 3) Do you have a girlfriend? Cuz I know you have a bunch of fangirls and Pico and Thalico shippers but you never said that you had a girlfriend. Just wondering... (Yeah let's go with that)

-Ilana, Daughter of Athena.

Dear Ilana,

Um… I GOT CAPTURED! Like, in my sleep. When I'm the most vulnerable. I like Green Day, but I have never heard of My Chemical Romance. Yeah, I have a girlfriend, but good ole' Rick doesn't seem to care a **** about my life. All he does is write about Percabeth. Not that I don't like it, but I'd like some chapters too.

-Nico DiAngelo.


	75. Chapter 75

Dear Leo,

*gets down on one knee* Will you do the honours of marrying me? I know I am not worthy, but... Do it for, er... Festus?

Azzy, daughter of Hermes.

Dear Azzy,

Sorry, I already swore my life with Reyna. But, hey, you could like, be the flower girl or something.

-Leo Valdez.

Dear Leo,

Uh, no. You didn't.

-Reyna.


	76. Chapter 76

Dear Lord Hades,

I'm not sure that's a fan club... By the way, are there really haunted houses or is that just people's imaginations running away with them? If there ARE haunted houses, did you send those spirits for a reason? What I mean is, are they there to relay some sort of message or anything like that? You don't have to answer if you don't want to. I just have a very inquisitive nature.

-44Lefty.

Dear 44Lefty,

Those spirits in the hunted houses are the ones forced to stay on earth because they didn't have any payment. Yeah, they aren't trying to scare you, they're just asking for money. But stupid mortals have this crazed idea that they want to take over your body and kill everyone. They're just beggars. Really.

-Lord Hades.


	77. Chapter 77

Dear all the gods and goddesses,

I agree with Celeste. Every time the gods and goddesses fight, mortals get caught up in it and hundreds, even THOUSANDS, of innocent people die! To make things fair, you should get someone from a neutral other group to write the treaty and handle the negotiations.

-44Lefty

P.S. I also recommend someone who has political experience. In other words, NOT ME!

Dear 44Lefty,

YES! YOU SHOULD TOTALLY DO IT!

-Apollo, god of awesomeness.

Dear Apollo,

Can't you see? She said, DON'T pick me.

-Athena.

Dear Athena,

So, we should have Cronus do it?

-Apollo.

Dear Apollo,

NO!

-Everyone.

Dear Apollo,

YES!

-Cronus.


	78. Chapter 78

Dear everyone (including the gods)

I'm curious, what would you do if you swapped genders for a week?

-Lily

P.S Lord Zeus, I'm sorry for what I said the previous time, I was half asleep and have no idea why I said that, you are awesome too :D

Dear Lily,

And have to be stuck in that kelp for brains' body? I'll skip.

-Athena.

Dear Athena,

She said that we just swap genders. Not bodies.

-Aphrodite.

Dear Aphrodite,

Yeah, but the thought that I'll have some way to be connected with him makes me sick.

-Athena.

Dear Athena,

Who?

-Apollo.

Dear Apollo,

Wow, you really don't know who I'm talking about? You know, seaweed brain, kelp head?

-Athena.

Dear Athena,

You mean Percy?

-Apollo.

Dear Apollo,

No.

-Athena.

**Can you guess who they're talking about? I bet you can't. Just kidding. :)**

**-Sophia, daughter of Apollo.**


	79. Chapter 79

Dear Nico,

I know this is touchy, but what helped you get over Bianca's death? I heard children of Hades are known to hold grudges.

-Syl.

Dear Syl,

You know, I never really got over it. I'm still secretly plotting against Percy. But if he keeps all this hero stuff up, I might not be able too.

-Nico DiAngelo.


	80. Chapter 80

Dear Reyna,

What is your opinion of Leyna?

Sincerely, Jimanji, Son of Hectate, Director of Camp Prytaneum.

Dear Jimanji,

I deny any and all accusations of me liking Leo Valdez.

-Reyna, praetor of New Rome.

Dear Reyna,

Are you sure? 'Cause I'm open!

-Leo Valdez.

**Dear Readers,**

**Over three hundred reviews! Yay! This is going so much better than I expected! Hope I'm making y'all laugh!**

**-Sophia, Daughter of Apollo.**


	81. Chapter 81

Dear Leo,

Can I join Team Leo? You are awesome! And is there a team Percy? If yes, can I join, if no, let's make one!

Gwen, daughter of Hecate.

Dear Gwen,

Yes! Of course! Although I've never heard of team Percy. I bet mine would be MUCH better though.

- Leo.

Dear Leo,

No, I would do even better!

-Percy.

Dear Percy,

Argh!

-Leo Valdez.

Dear Leo,

What was that?

-Percy Jackson.


	82. Chapter 82

Dear Artemis and Apollo,  
Apollo- Can you admit Artemis is older?  
Artemis- Can I join Your Hunters please?(my cousins are going to pay dearly)

-Angel, daughter of Athena, who really wants to kill her annoying perverted cousins.

P.S Artemis, Did you really like Orion? 'Cause it said you liked him that why Apollo tricked you into killing him and which tree is best for making bows?

P.P.S Can I hurt Apollo? Its getting to hot for archery practice.

Dear Angel,

Artemis is not older! And why would you hurt me? I am the definition of awesomeness.

-Apollo, god of awesomeness.

Dear Angel,

Osage orange, is probably the best wood, although it can be expensive. Of course you can hurt him. After all, he did insult me and my hunters with one of his haikus. And, yeah, I liked Orion. But sunny here always interferes with my life.

-Artemis.

Dear Artemis,

Yeah, sunny is one good nickname.

-Apollo, A.K.A. Sunny.


	83. Chapter 83

Dear... Well, everyone,

Thank you guys for answering my questions! Thanks Nico for letting my join your team (I guess Leo wasn't accepting at that time). Thank you almost everyone for answering truthfully *cough* Aphrodite *cough*.  
1. Conner, Travis, can you help me pull a prank on someone? And have you ever made someone... Disappear?  
2. Nico, Leo, what's it like being the only two without girlfriends? (And Nico, that could change for you if you wanted to *wink*)  
3. What do you guys think of the Lighting Theif movie?

-Sierra, still not a demigod.

Dear Sierra,

Who do you want us to pull it on? We've turned Piper's clothes invisible, made an entire cabin disappear, but never made a person disappear. I guess that's for all the Hecate kids.

-Connor and Travis. _No, Travis and Connor. _Connor and Travis!

Dear Sierra,

I'm never sad, I've got a whole team routing for me! Whoop whoop! Same here!

-Nico and Leo.

Dear Sierra,

THERES A MOVIE? First I just find out about a book written about my whole life by this stalker type person called Rick, now theres a movie? I'm gonna kill him. *Squints and grumbles evilly.*

-Percy Jackson.


	84. Chapter 84

Dear Poseidon,

If Percy ever died, would you turn him into a tree or something like Zeus did for Thalia? And if you did, what would it be?

-Nico, son of the lord of the underworld

Dear Nico,

First of all I would NEVER let it get that far! How dare you suggest that I would let harm befall my only demigod son! I am the supreme ruler of the sea, the god of earthquakes and tsunamis! But sea-green coral would fit his complexion nicely, would it not?

-Poseidon, caring father of the sea


	85. Chapter 85

Dear Everyone,

What do you all think of your representations in the god of war series?

-Jack, son of Hyperion. (Screw you apollo)  
P.S. Artemis, is Apollo's singing as bad as his poetry, or is it worse?

Dear Jack,

What? Now they're making video games too? First, Rick is writing books, then they make movies, and now video games? Humph. Now I know how that Jackson kid feels. Screw me? Huh? Well, I'll have you know, Hyperion and I are best buds.

-Apollo.

Dear Jack,

Yeah, his singing is just as bad as his poetry. Although don't say that to his face. (He's kinda sensitive when it comes to his singing.)

-Artemis, goddess of the hunt.

Dear Apollo,

Uh, no. We aren't "best buds."

-Hyperion.


	86. Chapter 86

Dear Leo,

Do you still have a crush on Thalia? Or are you so far gone with Hazel that you can't even remember Thalia's name? Do have a crush on Reyna? And for Nico: Do you really have a crush on Annabeth or is that over?

-Turquoise Taffy.

Dear Turquoise,

Thalia? Nah, I told her one day that she could forget about dating me, and she all like: "Finally! You got it through that thick skull of yours that I'm a hunter!" And I just stared off into space, acting like I was actually listening. Reyna? Yeah I like her! She's my girlfriend.

-Leo Valdez.

Dear Leo,

What did you say?

-Reyna.

Dear Turquoise,

No, I don't have a crush on Annabeth, and honestly, I don't think I ever did. I mean, maybe like a _big-sister-kinda-thingy-even-though-she's-not-at-a ll-related-to-me_ kind of way. I don't know.

-Nico DiAngelo, confused son of Hades.


End file.
